The day was going along splendidly. I had accomplished much on my TODO list including a trip to Home Depot {which was priceless}, used my new bolt cutters {yes, I am a proud owner} to do some work on the front deck, and picked up the ladder to hang the clouds that Boy Kacey gave to me back in November.
I need note now, as Any will get frustrated if I do not, the owner of the ladder offered to come and help the very afternoon I intended to hang up these clouds. I politely refused his offer as I knew he had some Mother's Day duties to attend to and I felt more than capable of such a menial task.
I got home, got the ladder up, and hung my first cloud. {Let me take a moment to describe said clouds. They weigh no more than 2 lbs. They are wood outlines based on Mickey Mouse that Boy Kacey created for a show at the Hale. They are whimsical and PERFECT for the house} It hung about 14 feet up. I got off of the ladder to check my work as I was home on my own. I was pleased with position and height so I climbed back up the ladder, not quite as high, to begin hammering the nails for the next cloud. This cloud I wanted a bit off center, to add to that whimsical theme Boy Kace had started. I leaned a bit to the left and managed to get the first nail in. Even more pleased with myself, I leaned again to the left {perhaps with a bit more confidence} and then I fell. Onto my left side. How far did I fall? Good question, the docs asked the same one. I say a bit more than a very large man, my feet were about ten feet from the ground.
{These pictures above only prove that I am fine and was able to appreciate my 28 birthday without help from narcotics} I laid on the floor for no longer than a minute before I began to test my limbs to make sure I could move. I could. My back was a bit sore {slightly understated} so I scooted slowly onto the large Lovesac that was about a foot and a half behind me. My phone was lying on it, beneath some books and DVDs I had taken down with me in the fall. I thought for a moment and then sent a text to some locals, "Whatcha doing? I may have fallen off of a ladder." At that point I called my Papa, I know I'm 28 {27 at that point} but that is my natural reaction in all emergencies, get Papa Jeff's direction. He was a bit dramatic and wanted me to call 911 and get an ambulance. That wasn't going to happen. I assured him that I was going to be fine as Juls was en route to me.
Juls and I made it to the doc who prescribed me some muscle relaxers, Lortab, and some meds so that I could keep the Lortab down ~ I had learned from falling off of the horse that up-chucking with a hurt back is a fate worse than death. I was in some serious pain at this point so we left the doc, who I adore for her med giving abilities and her confirmation of my thought to simply go see Dr. PT and Chiro on Monday ~ no new injury just aggravation of the old one {Dr. PT and I had a date every other day for a two weeks ~ he's a miracle worker he is as all is well at current} ~ to head to get some meds. I was flirting with Pharmacist Sam {totally my type Ace} and it was at this point Buba called, he had been called by Papa. He was on his mission when I had my initial fall. I think he felt it was his duty to come and play Brother to me as I was about to be as high as a kite on pain pills.
Buba took control of my phone for a bit, canceling my plans for the evening and monitoring my texts as I was far from earth for a bit. {I may have started to cry over the fact I hadn't seen Tomb Raider} But before he did this I had told Sir {the man who enjoyed hitting me to keep me breathing during my previous stint in the hospital} via text that cheesecake would make the world a better place. {Yes, there it is, the end is in sight for those that have read all of this!} He called and as he ring identifies him specifically as a Happy Human, Buba allowed me to answer. He took our orders ... Dulce de Leche for me ~ pictured way up at the top. He arrived in a timely manner with treats in hand. Buba, who was closely monitoring my meds to be sure I wasn't higher than a kite, handed me my next dose of the feel-good-pills as Sir handed me the cheesecake.
I'll be honest, the rest is a bit blurry. Sir stayed and kept me entertained for a bit, or perhaps I kept him entertained for longer than a bit. I do remember a conversation about how I had hung the clouds wrong, how any designer/engineer/testosterone heavy human should have hung the clouds rather than me. I fought that but in the end promised I would not venture up on the ladder again, as proven by the yet unhung clouds sitting not four feet from me while the ladder taunts me in the corner. Sir retold some of the stories from the first fall, exaggerating my inabilities and enhancing my cries. And then I fell asleep, with tummy happy and full and Buba set with the alarm to wake me for meds as the night turned into morning.
Church was the next day, I was certain that I could handle the full three hours. Binx, Any, and J were close at hand to keep me from making any ridiculous comments. After Sunday School I was feeling the need for some more meds and perhaps cheesecake {Sir had not eaten all of his or I had not eaten all of mine or something ~ I just knew there were leftovers in the fridge}. I knew it was just a matter of the proper tactics towards Binx {unlike Sir, who has ten years under his belt, Binx had not yet grown familiar with nor built up the proper defenses to deny me at the time of slight whine/batting of eyes/and pleading} ~ I was home within five minutes. Drugged-and-cheesecaked-up by minute seven.
Did the Bulls play that night? I don't even remember. I just know that the next time I take a stumble or totter or need heavy doses of high meds, Papa is not the first call I will make. It will be to the human nearest the Cheesecake Factory. Thank you Sir for indulging my request this one time. Thank you Buba for allowing me to answer the phone. Thank you Binx for recognizing that I did need to get home. And most of all, thank you to the wonderful people at the Cheesecake Factory for providing such a healing menu item.
