What I Know

Midst a moment I was having this evening I had a thought, "Tell Me what you do know." I was sitting in the House on the Hill {not the actual one, this one is in the middle of the city but for those of you that frequent the blog you will know where I am indicating without me actually saying it}. The thought could have come from a plethora of people that I am confident are a bit closer while in that House, those I miss and ache for especially in that place.  Or it could have been my own thought, asking for a self-analysis, as the daughter of a therapist this would not be an odd thought. Or it could have come from my Partner, the Man whose name I have taken upon me.  Regardless of the source, I responded.

* I know that the leaves are changing and that Sunday drives are mandatory
* I know that hearing a Christmas song will put me in an excellent mood, immediately
* I know that sometimes I do shed tears
* I know that I am heard
* I know that happiness is a choice ... a choice to be made by me ... a choice, not a consequence of circumstance
* I know that I will fight fiercely for my people, even with them if the situation calls for it
* I know that desiring something good and right can stretch my soul
* I know that WH and I can overcome a mishap at the mailbox but only after a slight outburst and a peacekeeping Coke is offered
* I know that spending time in the Good Word will help me shape my day productively
* I know that happiness is a choice ... a choice to be made by me ... a choice, not a consequence of circumstance
* I know that hearing 'Kas' from a voice that I trust will calm my anxiety
* I know that being caught singing at the top of my lungs with my windows down makes me laugh
* I know that I believe in reading to a child before bed, from a book that can be held in my hands
* I know that I will often speak to myself aloud, calling myself "Kate", deal with it
* I know that happiness is a choice ... a choice to be made by me ... a choice, not a consequence of circumstance
* I know that Uncle will call at least once a month and talk to me like an adult but allow me a moment to be a child in need of reassurance
* I know that listening to my Apostle Crush as I get ready in the morning keeps me from losing myself in outfit choices and curling irons
* I know that getting an email from oldest-baby-cousin about her first week at BYUI makes me feel old but also proud
* I know that having a message left from the parents is sometimes all I need as I'm told I'm loved, prayed for, and excelling in their eyes ... I keep those
* I know that happiness is a choice ... a choice to be made by me ... a choice, not a consequence of circumstance
* I know that Grandma Monica will be as up-to-date on Shondaland as I am
* I know that sitting quietly on Sunday as I worship in song before the sacrament is served will always cause me to think of President Ludlow's words before I left Spokane
* I know that other's choices can cause hurt in the lives of those I love and my own
* I know that my choices can hurt those whom I love
* I know that thinking before I speak is wise
* I know that happiness is a choice ... a choice to be made by me ... a choice, not a consequence of circumstance
* I know that when emotions, feelings, and gooey stuff is being discussed I can respond without insult
* I know that sides don't always need to be taken
* I know that life is precious
* I know that a man that has the ability to drive a manual car is a MAN
* I know that happiness is a choice ... a choice to be made by me ... a choice, not a consequence of circumstance
* I know that aching for something not quite here is allowed
* I know that counting down to the end of something brings it faster
* I know that good food with a good friend is often all that is necessary
* I know that speaking to Gramps each week will reassure me that a part of him is in me, giving me the gumption to go conquer the beasts of my world
* I know that happiness is a choice ... a choice to be made by me ... a choice, not a consequence of circumstance
* I know that I cannot do two things at once
* I know that rereading thoughts from past studies can teach me
* I know that people can be forgiving
* I know that sitting in the House on the Corner after a surprise end is allowed but no longer necessary
* I know that happiness is a choice ... a choice to be made by me ... a choice, not a consequence of circumstance
* I know that laughing at the State Fair can be a much needed distraction
* I know that speaking Spanish for work tomorrow is terrifying
* I know that being looked to as someone with something to offer is exhilarating
* I know that Dinner in a Pumpkin is something I am good at
* I know that happiness is a choice ... a choice to be made by me ... a choice, not a consequence of circumstance
* I know that my memory is far from perfect
* I know that being called a Guy's Girl today at work will keep me happy for quite sometime
* I know that Papa will not force me to talk about things but speak in even tones until I am willing and ready to bring things up on my own
* I know that my dog is far from me
* I know that a well-timed kiss on the forehead will melt me
* I know that happiness is a choice ... a choice to be made by me ... a choice, not a consequence of circumstance
* I know that I will hurt deeply when trust is broken
* I know that a quiet drive with a stop to look at the stars, on my own, is just fine
* I know that the House on the Lake is no longer mine
* I know that sometimes a call to CA is more of a cop-out than courageous
* I know that happiness is a choice ... a choice to be made by me ... a choice, not a consequence of circumstance
* I know that trying is often all that is asked
* I know that excuses are easily made but not easily justified
* I know that being still is key to remembrance
* I know that Mom understands through the sobs she hears on the other end of the line
* I know that happiness is a choice ... a choice to be made by me ... a choice, not a consequence of circumstance
* I know that being honest with oneself is one of the greatest gifts to be offered
* I know that dancing it out is a quick fix to all problems
* I know that He laughs with me and at me
* I know that my work in the hands of an editor is so much of what I've wanted for so long yet the most unsettling place to be
* I know that happiness is a choice ... a choice to be made by me ... a choice, not a consequence of circumstance
* I know that trust can be rebuilt
* I know that smiling from across the hall can be a tender mercy
* I know that death is inevitable
* I know that getting things ready for the House on the Hill while listening to 'The Bulldog' will more often than not be the perfect prelude to the lesson learned within the House
* I know that happiness is a choice ... a choice to be made by me ... a choice, not a consequence of circumstance
* I know that getting lost in a football game is a happy place for me
* I know that being ready for the next thing means to hope for it
* I know that the unexpected is often the most necessary while the most unnecessary is usually sought after
* I know that showing up counts for a lot
* I know that happiness is a choice ... a choice to be made by me ... a choice, not a consequence of circumstance
* I know that John Krasinski still wins
* I know that progress has been made
* I know what is my truth
* I know what I am certain of
* I know that happiness is a choice ... a choice to be made by me ... a choice, not a consequence of circumstance
* I know that I can stand on my own two feet
* I know that I will always spell my first love's name in sign language before I speak harsh words, my version of counting to ten
* I know that baking a secret Robin recipe takes me 'home'
* I know offering a sincere 'thank you' with a wink will get you another 'helping'
* I know that happiness is a choice ... a choice to be made by me ... a choice, not a consequence of circumstance
* I know that I interrupt people
* I know that a hand in the small of my back as I leave a room will get me to follow you anywhere
* I know that time on the parents bed with Harli in her chair and a ridiculous Hallmark movie on the television will cure all
* I know that the benefit of the doubt should be offered
* I know that happiness is a choice ... a choice to be made by me ... a choice, not a consequence of circumstance
* I know that kindness is the best choice

I know that all that I know, as little as it may be, is enough for tonight. {the repeats were purposeful}