April Fools Lesson

I love these little holidays ... St. Patrick's Day, Cashmere Pulaski Day, April Fool's Day ... I enjoy the fun, humor, and laughter that each day ensures.

This year's prank was well planned out. Monday morning it all began, BBBB (henceforth known as B4) was the target (all other names have been changed to protect the innocent). Barb had Skyler, her boyfriend, call B4 as Burt (for those of you unfamiliar with Burt, we've dated ... not dated ... dated ... not dated ... dated ... not dated ... for a bit of time. B4 has been on the band wagon for Burt since counseling on the first freak-out moment).

Skyler: B4, this is Burt.
B4: Hi there.
Skyler: I need to talk to you about Kas missing some work this week.
B4: Can I call you back in just a moment Burt?
Skyler: Sure.

B4 called 'Burt' back from a quiet room so we were unable to hear that part of the conversation. However, Skyler was quick to call Barb and say "He bit hard." What did he bite? Oh, just the fact that people, namely me, were going to final have to face up to reality and answer an eternal question yes or no, in person.

All of Monday afternoon B4 was smiles and laughter. Encouraging any type of conversation regarding Burt. I had the hardest time not laughing, most of the day I had to stay in my own little corner, ignoring the outside office world.

Tuesday, I was supposed to come in after having a fight the night before ... a fight caused by unexpected visits and just the general orneriness of Kasi ~ absolutely believable. I sat with Itunes turned up again. It wasn't until the end of the day that it was actually discussed with B4. He had been talking with Jeff, another co-worker, for most of the day regarding my backup ~ because obviously I was going to need some time off to plan a wedding. Jeff encouraged the thought process and pushed B4 to a new depth in his bite. Jeff had said that he was under the impression that Burt and I had gotten into a pretty bad fight. B4, because he is such a good guy, was worried. Our conversation late yesterday afternoon went something like this.

B4: So people are in town? What are the plans?
Me: Ummm ... well, I don't really know.

At this point I did something with my eyes, something that people that know me can immediately identify as my 'lie cue' ... B4 knows me.

B4: You're lying, you did that thing with your eyes Kas.

I WAS WORRIED I HAD BLOWN IT, I've never excelled at story telling or lying ... MAYBE IT WOULD HAVE BEEN BETTER HAD I BLOWN IT.

Me: Oh, I guess we're going to dinner but we had a fight so I really don't know.
B4: A bad fight or a normal fight.
Me: It was average.
B4: Was it your fault?
Me: Probably.
B4: Kasi, apologize. You just need to understand that you have to say you're sorry.
Me: I have a hard time apologizing.
B4: Kas, if you want this to work, you need to apologize.

I had to turn my head ... he was teaching me a valuable lesson. HUMBLE YOURSELF.

This morning I was hesitant, we all were. We brought in a cake to lesson the blow. The plan was for me to tell B4 that Burt had asked, I had taken the ring, and left more confused than ever then ask him to go with me into the conference room so we could talk more about it. Waiting for us in the conf room was going to be the entire team, 19 people, with the cake. End of story.

However, that failed. He made it to the conference room without me to look for some 'missing employees'. I was left at my desk in a panic, how was this going to come to an end? I for certain was not getting engaged and couldn't have B4 thinking I was. Barb, Katy, and Ashley had confidence that we could still pull this off ... drag him out just a bit more. It took a five minute pep talk in the bathroom to convince me that this could be done, even then I took Barb in the meeting room with me, I was going to blow it.

This is when I should have stopped it...

B4 comes in, concerned that the girl who sits quietly in her corner when things go wrong, is now visibly (thanks to a splash on the face with water) upset. He asks what happened and I, with Barb's help, told the story. B4 then got serious. He spent the next ten minutes telling me why I shouldn't be scared, why I should finally stop running, why it didn't mater what might happen. What did matter is whether or not I was willing to see it through. I listened and all of the sudden real tears came. It was basically a therapy session, one of the best I've ever had. He was honest about what would come. He was honest about what initial reactions I may have. He was honest about it all. By the end of the conversation I was convinced that marriage, to Burt or anyone for that matter, is no longer something I run should run from.

When we left the room ... the group was there with cameras in hand. I think my tear stained eyes were the biggest surprise to them. To me, the biggest surprise was rather the fact that after 9 years of running, six failed relationships, real therapy sessions, and countless hours pondering things ... I apparently do want to get married. Who would have thought?